Grief doesn't just sit there. It moves, it shifts, and if you don't look it in the eye, it eventually starts calling the shots. Ruth Langsford recently opened up about how counseling changed her life after the death of her sister, Julia. It wasn't just a "nice to have" or a celebrity whim. For anyone who’s ever felt like they’re drowning while trying to keep a smile on for the cameras—or just for the neighbors—her experience is a massive reality check.
Most people wait until they’re in a total blackout of despair before they book a session. We treat mental health like an emergency room visit rather than basic maintenance. But Ruth’s point is sharper than that. She didn't just survive the sessions; she credits them with her ability to function today. When you're a public figure, "keeping calm and carrying on" is practically in the job description. Breaking that mold takes guts. Expanding on this idea, you can also read: How the Pickle Rental App is Finally Fixing the Disaster in Your Closet.
The Myth of Moving On
We've been sold a lie about the stages of grief. You've probably seen the charts. Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance. It looks neat. It looks like a staircase. In reality, it’s a bowl of tangled yarn. You can feel "fine" on a Tuesday and be unable to get out of bed on Wednesday because a specific song played in the supermarket.
Ruth’s sister died by suicide in 2019. That’s not the kind of loss you "get over" with a weekend at a spa or a few extra hours of sleep. It’s a fundamental shifting of your internal tectonic plates. Counseling provides a container for that mess. It’s a place where you don't have to worry about upsetting your husband, your son, or your coworkers. You can just be the person who is falling apart. Experts at The Spruce have provided expertise on this situation.
Why Talking to a Professional Beats Talking to a Friend
I hear this all the time. "I don't need a therapist, I have my mates." Friends are great. They're essential. But your friends are biased. They want you to feel better because they love you, and honestly, because it’s uncomfortable for them when you’re miserable for two years straight. They give advice. They try to "fix" it.
A counselor isn't there to fix you. They’re there to hold a mirror up to your thoughts. When Ruth talks about her sessions, she emphasizes the freedom of talking to a stranger. There’s no baggage. There’s no "oh, here she goes again." It’s professional objectivity. That distance is exactly what allows for the breakthrough.
The Physical Toll of Suppressing Emotions
If you think mental health is just in your head, you aren't paying attention to your body. Unresolved trauma and heavy grief manifest physically. We're talking about cortisol spikes, inflammation, and chronic exhaustion. Ruth has been candid about the "brain fog" and the lethargy that comes with depression and menopause—a double hit that many women in their 50s and 60s face.
Ignoring the emotional weight doesn't make it disappear. It just turns into a backache or a permanent tension headache. By engaging in talk therapy, you’re literally offloading the physiological stress. You’re giving your nervous system a chance to downshift from "fight or flight" into something resembling peace.
Breaking the Stigma for a Different Generation
There’s a specific grit associated with people of Ruth’s generation. You don't complain. You wash your face and you get on with it. While that resilience is admirable, it can also be a cage. By speaking out on platforms like Loose Women or in her various interviews, she’s giving permission to millions of viewers who grew up thinking therapy was for "crazy" people or Americans in movies.
It’s not a sign of weakness. It’s an investment. If your car’s engine started smoking on the motorway, you wouldn't keep driving and hope for the best. You’d pull over. Therapy is pulling over before the whole thing blows up.
Finding the Right Fit Matters
Don't think that one bad experience means therapy isn't for you. It’s like dating. Sometimes you meet someone and there’s just no spark. If you’ve tried it once and felt judged or bored, try someone else. Look for different modalities. Some people need Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) to handle specific thought patterns. Others need psychodynamic therapy to dig into the past.
Ruth’s experience worked because she committed to the process. She didn't go once and expect a miracle. She did the work.
What You Can Do Right Now
If you’re feeling the weight that Ruth described, don't wait for a total collapse. You can start small.
- Check your employee benefits. Many companies offer an EAP (Employee Assistance Program) that gives you six sessions for free. No one in your office even has to know.
- Look for specialized charities. If you're dealing with a specific type of loss, organizations like Cruse Bereavement Support or Survivors of Bereavement by Suicide (SoBS) offer targeted help.
- Audit your "brave face." Spend a day noticing how much energy you spend pretending to be okay. If that number is high, you’re a prime candidate for a professional ear.
- Use the BACP directory. The British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy has a searchable database. You can filter by price, location, and what they specialize in.
Stop waiting for the "right time" to deal with your head. There’s no perfect moment to start unpicking your life. There’s just today, and the choice to stop carrying the weight by yourself. If a woman with a high-pressure TV career and a million eyes on her can find the time to sit in a room and cry with a stranger, you can too.
Go find a therapist. It might be the best thing you ever do.
